Below is a picture of my neighbor who fell on Wednesday night. If you are curious, scroll down. If you are not, stop here. Just want to warn you. Thanks for stopping by...*
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Isn't this pitiful? This is what she looked like when I visited her Thursday evening. I asked her if I could take her picture and she was fine with me doing so. I have been quite shaken up since this happened. She is right next door to us and I love doing things for her, visiting with her and sharing yummy foods. This is actually how this all started...with her fresh-baked cookies for the new neighbors who live right behind us. I was sitting outside with Macy and heard Wanda's back door open. It has a little "squeak" so I always know when she's coming out. :) I said hi and noticed she was heading through her yard in her nightgown and robe. I told her I'd go get her plastic container to return to her (she had shared some jello with me). She told me she'd be right back as she was taking cookies to the new neighbors. They had JUST been in their back yard so she knew they were out. She went through her gate and into their yard...saying YOO HOO the whole time and taking delicate little steps to keep her balance. Meanwhile, I thought I'd join her and introduce myself as well. So, I ran in to get my shoes...and her container. I came back out and saw her...
It was like time sort of stopped as I watched her make her way up their deck steps....kinda wobbling as she did so. She kept yelling YOO HOO and noticing that the neighbors had walked to their front yard and couldn't hear her. My first instinct was like that of a mother....say something, just tell her to stop and that you'll help her...but nothing came out of my mouth. I just stood and watched. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I was getting nervous, but nothing was coming out of my mouth. Then, it happened.
She didn't realize their deck had two levels and she literally fell over the step that goes down to the next level. I heard it all and I saw it all....from a distance that didn't allow me to get to her immediately. It was as if someone had hurled two heavy lawn chairs across the deck. It sounded so terrible that it still haunts me! The neighbor yelled "It's not dad, it a WOMAN!" in a voice that let me clearly know that Wanda was a stranger to her. I was in shock at that point and shouted, "It's Wanda. I'll be right there!" I had to run through our breezeway and around the front of the house to get to her gate, then through her yard, up their deck and right to Wanda. She wasn't moving and all I could think was "Dear Lord, not today. Please not today." I thought she was either dead or unconscious. I then discovered she was awake, but couldn't move and didn't want us to call 911. I saw blood by her head and told her she needed medical attention. The neighbor Cara stayed by her. She was in shock, too. Wanda still wasn't moving.
I had to run back to my house to call 911. The new neighbors had no new home phone yet. I was totally out of breath and tried to stay calm as I told the dispatcher the details. I probably sounded like I was having a heart attack myself. By the time I yelled for Kevin to follow me, got my purse and was running back, I heard the sirens. I ran over to Wanda's to lock up, get her medical info and back to the deck. Her cat was so happy to see me and all I could say was "Toby, move. Move, move, move." I remember glancing at the knobs on the stove to ensure she hadn't been cooking. It was all so surreal at that point.
When I got back to Wanda, the neighbor had her sitting up and I saw her face. It was a disaster to say the least. She had a huge bump, a black eye and was bleeding on her nose and from her nose. They had gotten her an ice pack, found her broken glasses and given her a light blanket for her legs. I kept reassuring her that it would be best to go to the hospital. All she would say is "I'm alright."
The EMTs arrived and while they assessed her, I called her daughter in Akron on my cell phone. She was at work, so her husband called her and she called me back. The EMTs wanted to take Wanda, but she was refusing (in a nice way). When her daughter called me, the EMT spoke to her and gave details/got details. I was fishing in Wanda's purse and trying to keep my sanity/breath as I looked for her med list/allergies, etc. They asked her the general alertness questions to assess her neurological state (name, date, place, what happened, etc.). She didn't knock herself out, but was so stunned she couldn't move when she first fell. I gave her my makeup mirror to see for herself how big the goose egg was near her eyebrow. All this time, I was in a blur and just trying to stay calm and persuade her to go with the squad. The EMTs were so nice, professional and calming. The one reassured me that it was most likely just a bad hematoma and that older people swell worse than us younger ones. He really thought after the assessment that she was ok. I asked if she should be x-rayed, get a CT, etc. I just wanted to know that she wasn't bleeding internally, too. I already knew that her daughter would want her to go. She's a nurse so she knows what can happen when an elderly person falls that hard.
You see....I really love this woman. She is not just a neighbor. She is like family to me. I am the one besides her family that knows more about her medical history and I am so glad I was in my back yard at that exact moment. What if I wasn't there and the new neighbors didn't know where she lived? What if I had told her to stop!? What if I wasn't off on Wed afternoons and hadn't been sitting out with Macy?! I have gone over the woulda/coulda/shoulda in my mind so much that it has worn me out. Once the adrenaline finally leveled off today, my body and mind just felt exhausted. I kept recounting over and over in my sleep her steps up the deck and that sound of when she fell. That sound is haunting me still.
Since Wanda was coherent and refused transport, the EMTs carried her back home via this special transport chair. She had to sign a form of refusal and I waited with her until Luanne arrived from Akron at about 10pm. While waiting, I nursed her every need and we talked about this and that. I wanted her to stay awake. I was so afraid that if she fell asleep, she'd die or something. I was just so afraid. At one point, she closed her eyes and rested on the couch. I could tell she was tired and told me she just didn't feel "peppy". All I could hear was the tick of the clock. I kept watching her, making sure she was breathing and looking at that horrid swollen bump and black eye. Every now and then I'd think about how she was laying and it was the same position of someone in a casket. I had to look away so I didn't bawl. All I could think was how fortunate she was to not have broken a hip or that she didn't hit her head hard enough to kill herself. She is 87 years old. She is the cutest little peanut you've ever seen, yet she is so frail in ways. I just love her and hate to think that I almost had to tell her goodbye. She fell so hard that it's a shock she isn't shattered into a million pieces ! I know she'll never read this, but I think she knows how much I love her. I try to show her in many ways. Her daughter even told me last night that I am family to them. I was honored when she said that because I feel the same way about them.
I am still so shaken up today and tear up at the very thought of it all over again. It's been a crazy day. I did my job at work in a blur. Mom and I went to calling hours for my cousin's father-in-law. I am supposed to get packed for my mom and I to scrapbook tomorrow night. I haven't done anything for that. I am just sort of in a fog still. It's hard to explain why this has effected me so much. Perhaps it's just because this week I have been reminded just how precious each life is.
And lastly.....remember I mentioned the lady with cancer who is awaiting brain surgery? She is to have surgery Friday August 15th about 11:30am Eastern time. Please pray for her. This may be her last chance at beating this metastatic breast cancer. Her treatments failed to shrink the tumors. I just pray that God guides the surgeon's hand. I am not ready to say goodbye to her either. No matter what happens, I know one thing. God is good....all the time...and He has a divine plan for us all. Even if it involves goodbye.
Thanks for reading my thoughts and feelings. It's been an emotional week to say the least. I'll try to be a little more "peppy" on the next post. :)
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